I am new to this forum and I have read many of the posted topics and found them to be very helpful in many situations.
So as you can see, I have posted a possible lengthy one. Why are relationships so complicated? Well let me first begin by stating that I begin dating a man almost one year ago. I had just come out of a long term relationship and he too and so we truly went too fast. We experienced some pains of starting off this way however, we worked through it and took one day at a time. We all know God's hesitancy in getting involved with a relationship "unequally yoked" and I will say that I was in this type of relationship. It was fun and exciting but I knew all along there were differences between he and I. The days progressed until one day he had a guy friend visit him and let's just say this guy had never been the best influence on him.... They proceeded with the day and into the night and indulged into some festivities into the early morning. When I learned of this that evening, I was a bit upset. In his state he over-reacted and this led to the problem He cheated that night after our encounter. Two months passed and even knowing intuitively all along what probably happened... I did not want to face it.. Well these two months passed and he told me the truth and openly admitted to cheating on me. He was very upset and went to church with me and broke down. So his heart was hurting and I was mad. Some part of me wanted him to suffer and knowing that is not the right response I needed... I began to struggle. So here we are today and I struggle with trust even though he has changed in many ways. He has began a bible study with some of our mentors at church every Friday morning. I have flooded his home with spirtual books, cds, etc. God has truly changed his life in many ways and now more than ever he is beginning to understand the bible and the life principles it outlines for our individual lives'. He has had an interest that I have not seen before. I am so happy for him. So I would say that he is in the beginning stages of learning.
I praise him for this however one of the concerning areas of our relationship exists in how he communicates with me. This man came from a family of broken parents - there was cheating that occurred and so I say that, to say that he has insecurities that stem from this occurrence. He was a teenager when it happened and he witnessed and was in the middle of the entire ordeal. These insecurities tend to rule over him and now it seems as if it is effecting our relationship because he is insecure with me for reasons that do not exist. I have went above and beyond to prove to him that he could trust me with his heart - I just believe it may be him and his actions. Not sure. He plays in a country band and in these environments things are not good! Especially for any relationship..... Even though we all can guard ourselves, I believe in not putting ourselves in compromising situations. He has a love for this however I see that it can be damaging later. Whenever I verbalize this to him he gets mad and lashes out and says things that are very hurtful. I am reaching out for advice as to if anyone has had a similar experience? If so what do I do? I am on the edge of ending this relationship all together and have even stated that more than once. However I do love this man and would do anything for him. I don't know what else to do. I think his insecurities as stated earlier have led to this path of behavior. What do you think? If so would counseling help?
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